Allison Lesley Bass McGuire

Jennifer Bass and Sean McGuire are the proud parents of this little Christmas dumpling. Jenn says she looks like her, but I'm not so sure. I see some Irish eyes a smilin' in there somewhere. She was born at St. Mary's Hospital in Jefferson City, Mo., Dec. 16 at 4 a.m. (on the button) 6 lbs. 10 oz. (not playing the part of a preemie much, eh?) and 18 in. long. Many hugs and kisses to all! This is her on Christmas Eve, dreaming of sugar plum fairies I'm sure.

Go, go Godzilla!

I told my friend Ana about our exotic invasive species -- the iguana. Fun to see hanging in the mangroves, yes, but not so fun as they strip your hibiscus to a twig in a matter of minutes and leave big poops on the patio. Here's our resident reptile, named Godzilla by the neighbor boy, Thomas.

Invasive species (also called exotic species, bioinvaders): Organisms are introduced into a foreign ecosystem, by humans, either intentionally (e.g., crop plants, feed animals), or unintentionally. Introduced within a strange ecosystem, where the inhabitants are adjusted to each other and their environments, most introduced species die, unless taken care of by humans. But, particularly if ecosystems are already disturbed (e.g., by pollution, global warming) , and particularly in warm climates (no frost), some thrive and become pests.

In laymen's speak, what this means is that someone or someones had pet iguanas and set them free, much like the famed "alligator flush" in the movie, and they -- not having any natural predators and finding the tropical climate much like their own native environment -- multiplied like rabbits. Mmmm. Rabbits.

Butt, I love you!

one fish, two fish

Three ballyhoo fish! I got to test out my new sweet Christmas custom rod with a new Shimano reel, and we brought the kids' reel for Macy, but she was content playing with the bait. Who knew dead ballyhoo could sing, dance and poke each other in the eye so well?

A collision of stars and how it all works

Thinking about birthdays and astrology and how we all fall under our signs, I found this on a blog -- http://armchairfrog.blogspot.com/2005/03/aries-sign-of-spring.html -- and ripped it off. I cracked up several times and hope you all can appreciate it too....

Aries - The Sign of Spring

This is a compact Spring. The equinox was just a few days ago, the full moon was last night, and so tomorrow is Easter. All the energy of Aries is roaring away. But then, Aries is an energetic sign, it wants to get stuff done.

Taurus says "Hey, wait a minute. Are we actually accomplishing anything concrete here? I think we should let it all settle and stay put for a while."

Gemini: "Well I can see your point. But action is good too. Maybe we can have lots of change, yet consolidate what we have as well."

Cancer worries that all this is too disturbing, and wants to take care of everyone, making sure that people come first, whatever the circumstances.

Leo is grateful for this confidence-giving support, and goes out to entertain the world, full of good cheer.

Virgo, usefully, wants to make sure that things are in order and that Leo does not get too far away from home base without adequate organization and a plan.

Libra understands that this irritates Leo, but agrees with Virgo too. She tries to avoid any disagreement breaking out and insists that everyone calm down.

Scorpio, in this climate, has to keep really quiet about his intentions, for fear of being forced to be agreeable. Best to keep quiet.

Sagittarius can't be bothered with all this caution and plotting and just goes ahead and does what he wants. Most people don't even notice.

That's not good enough for Capricorn, who wants to be able to see concrete and accumulating results of her actions, and works steadily towards that sensible goal.

Aquarius is not so happy about this ambitious way of operating, and doesn't think it is right. Aquarius feels he understands the way people ought to behave, and is very willing to explain it to everyone, whether they want to hear or not.

Pisces gets confused. If you tell people what to do, like Aquarius does, people don't do it. So what's the point? What should we do or say, then? What do we want? What do I want?

Then Aries comes back in saying "Oh for goodness sake. Stop being so self-involved. Just DO something." Then she brushes aside all nay-sayers and does things.

So Taurus has to pick up the pieces and show Pisces that there are things he can rely on. Just stay home and ride it out.

Gemini likes what Capricorn did quite a while ago, but loves to agree with Aquarius's wisdom too, so writes poems about it.

Cancer is proud of all these clever people, (though she would appreciate a little more respect) and tells them all to do their thing.

So Leo does. People think he's cool.

Virgo keeps the records and files all the programs.

Libra says “isn’t that nice?”

Scorpio is heartily sick of all the chumminess, and plots to escape.

Sagittarius strikes out for freedom openly, and messes up Scorpio’s plans.

Capricorn gets cross with them all, and demands order.

Aquarius tells them this discord is destructive, and to stop being so selfish.

Pisces feels crushed, and sulks in a corner.

So then, back comes Aries again. “Oh I am sick of all this gloom. I’m going out.”

And off we go again.

Happy Birthday Macy!

Our baby turns four Jan. 12, the same day my mother and Aunt Kathy turn (much older than they'll ever be to any of us). This photo was taken when she was about a year and a half, just after we moved here. And in my mind I always see her this way, discovering the world for the first time every single day. The more my daughters grow, the wider the parallels between them become. Macy, our modern dancer who never misses the chance to sway to the rhythm of our lives; theatrics orchestrator who can demonstrate a surprise with more gusto than even the most seasoned actor; singer who creates long ballads for the entire house to enjoy as she sits for a while on the potty; Spanish goddess who enchants us with each roll of the tongue; toughman who bounces and rather than cry, gets mad and kicks the offender whether human or object; self-proclaimed (as dubbed by fellow pre-schooler) "kissy face" who has enough love to share with anyone around her; master cuddler who, no matter how late or early in the day, will wake up and wedge herself solidly between her mother and father; and braveheart who has enough moxy to ask the question everyone else is avoiding -- "how did you lose your arm and where can you get another one?" -- we admire how much you've grown and how as we have fostered you, you have raised us too. Never let go of 4-years-old my girl.

Claire, freshly nine, asked the million dollar question on our way home from work yesterday. You know, "how did you get pregnant with me?" So there we were, and there I was, driving across the Seven Mile Bridge after a loooong day of brain-straining wordsmithing, reminding myself before I opened my mouth (not my forte by the way) that I had but one chance to give an answer that would shape a future of womanhood. Be short, accurate and to-the-point, I said to myself. Be clinical while sparing the gory details and loving without being mushy. And I did. I offered the classic intro of "when a man and a woman love each other very much" and ended with the sperm fertilizing the egg (no it doesn't look like a chicken egg, we giggled) that begins to grow a baby. Next -- a long silence. But I was satisfied with my answer, being unprepared for the question and all (how do you cram for that one, or rather, have you been "cramming" for a long time but never had to scale it down to the elementary school level?) More silence. "That... is sooo... gross." More giggles. All was well with the world. Next question. Which was why women get periods. I explained that "funny you should ask" because it's all the same theme, and thank God we were almost home to keep from going to whatever topic was about to follow. And just like when she asked about the Chinese tradition of food-binding, I assume I'll print some info off of Wikipedia and let her study it as long or as short as she wishes. And touche, My Claire de Lune, may you hang onto nine for a very, very long time.

Michele and Claire

Rarely does a friend come along in this world that loves you, your kids and your pets with such warmth. Appreciate them when they cross your path -- and offer you a glass of wine ;)

RIP Bubba Buster Rooney Bubbaroo Adams

What a proud old man, friend to man, friend to Sugar (in the background chasing the elusive coconut), Luke, Zeus and all other creatures. Surely his patience for men, children and creatures, no matter how scruffy and obnoxious, serves as a lesson to us all. After nearly two decades on the sand and sea both far and wide, he peacefully passed and moved on to the proverbial doggie heaven. May he greet us with loud barks of welcome when we arrive on our own passage.

Cyberslacking

Please check out the links posted on the righthand column of this Web site to keep up on the commerce we and our friends are making careers out of -- but if you want to waste time and have some fun, visit these. Also, if you want me to link your biz site to my links, let me know!

www.engrish.com
www.mycathatesme.com
www.elfyourself.com

There are some great face-morphing sites I pulled off the wire at work -- I'll add those later.

Here's McClatchy Tribune's top picks for 2006:

Web Search: Best of 2006 online
By Randy A. Salas
McClatchy Newspapers

As another year draws to a close, various Web sites have started posting their "best of 2006" selections. Some of these sample lists don't cover typical subjects, but, hey, this is Web Search.

TOP BABY NAMES If it's Aidan or rhymes with it, BabyNames.com (www.babynames.com) likes it for a boy's name. The site's more than 1 million members listed Aidan (Aiden, Aden) as their favorite boy's name. Their top boys' names of 2006 also included Caden (Kaden) at No. 2, Braden (Brayden, Braeden) at No. 3, Jaden (Jayden) at No. 4, and Hayden at No. 11. Ethan was No. 5. For girls, Ava was tops, followed by, in order, Abigail, Cailyn (Kaelyn), Madison and Emma.

WORD OF THE YEAR "Truthiness," coined by Stephen Colbert of Comedy Central's "The Colbert Report," was picked by visitors to Merriam-Webster's Web site (www.m-w.com/info/06words.htm) by a 5-1 majority vote as the word of the year. Colbert said it means "truth that comes from the gut, not books." The American Dialect Society formally defined it later as meaning "the quality of preferring concepts or facts one wishes to be true, rather than concepts or facts known to be true." The rest of the top five: "google," "decider," "war," and "insurgent."

TOP NATURE VIDEO National Geographic News (news.nationalgeographic.com) recently announced its biggest stories of 2006 (www.startribune.com/a2069), a list topped by the revealing of the Gospel of Judas. But more interesting, certainly from a visceral standpoint, is National Geographic's best videos of 2006 (www.startribune.com/a2068), topped by amazing footage of a giant Pacific octopus battling a spiny dogfish shark in an aquarium.

TOP SCAM The Consumer Affairs Web site (www.consumeraffairs.com) says that after evaluating the 50,000 consumer complaints it received in 2006, its top scam of the year is a growing scheme in which victims are told they have won a lottery in Canada or Europe and must pay various fees to collect it. One Kansas man lost $300,000. "You can't win a contest that you didn't enter," one official reminded consumers.

FUNNIEST POLITICAL QUOTE Politics are a funny business to pundit Howard Mortman, aka Extreme Mortman, so it's only natural that he compile his list of the funniest political quotes of 2006 for his blog (www.extrememortman.com). Sen. Ted Stevens' comment that the Internet is "a series of tubes" seemed like a shoo-in when he uttered it in June. But then Sen. John Kerry came up with his much-publicized zinger to top Mortman's list: "If you make the most of (education), you study hard, you do your homework, and you make an effort to be smart, you can do well. If you don't, you get stuck in Iraq." Kerry later said that he was trying to make a joke, but that it came out wrong. "We'll believe him," Mortman said in explaining his choice. "But not without a price."

BEST VIRAL VIDEO Forget the top movies of 2006. IFILM has weighed in with its best viral videos of the year (www.ifilm.com/collection/18220) _ the kind of clips that are passed around by e-mail and posted on blogs and other sites. Top candidates included comedian Michael Richards' racist tirade during a show, news personality Connie Chung massacring "Thanks for the Memories" and comedian Judson Laipply performing seemingly every dance move of the past 50 years in six minutes. But the winner was "Brokeback to the Future," a hilarious faux movie trailer using existing footage to suggest that Marty McFly and Doc Brown had a more personal relationship in the "Back to the Future" films.

TYPO OF THE YEAR The must-read site Regret the Error (www.regrettheerror.com), which tracks mistakes in the media, honors Reuters for creating the typographical error of the year in a story about a recall of "beef panties" (www.startribune.com/a2072). What kind of buns go with those?

(Randy A. Salas is a columnist for the Minneapolis Star Tribune. Do you have a favorite Web site or a question about how to find something on the Internet? E-mail websearch@startribune.com or go to his blog, www.startribune.com/websearch.)

All snug in their beds

After a birthday outing to Ripley's, Sunset Celebration, Hard Rock Cafe, a ghost tour on the way back to the van and a stop at the Looe Key Tiki to dance a couple songs, it was back home for the screening of "The Princess Bride." From left, Macy, Jackie, Claire, Reanna and Sabrina. Five girls on a sofa bed, Christmas cookies and one tired mama. Wouldn't you know they kept me up until 2:30 a.m. It was a magical evening to be 9 -- or 32.

Silver Man rules!

Of all the buskers at Sunset Celebration, perhaps it was the Silver Man that the girls were most enthralled with. Is he a statue? Nope, there's an ear wiggle. Throw a few bucks in his bucket and he'll oblige with robotic high-fives for all and even leave a little silver on your hand! Surely the best souvenir of the evening!

A bird on the head...

Is worth two in the Head Zoo? We never miss an opportunity to chase the resident fowl in the sculpture garden at Mallory Square for the Sunset Celebration. Call me chicken, but this overprotective mama chased us on this visit!

Funhouse mirror

A distorted Sabrina and Macy during our outing to Ripley's Believe It Or Not! for Claire's 9th birthday soiree in Key West.

A walk home from the tiki?

Obviously, somebody leaving Looe Key Tiki had a few two many to be driving, and some other poor sap probably had a long walk home!

Merry Fishmas!

You're a mean one Mr. Grinch

The cops frequently set up a speed trap across the street from the Keynoter, which is great entertainment on a deadline day, but it's never really front-page photo worthy. Except when the Grinch comes to help them run radar. He was waving speeders over to the side of the road and yes, they were ticketed. Talk about steeling cheer!

Keith and Crystal

At the Boondocks party -- this is Crystal, who Keith works the bar floor with every weekend. She's a deal!

Actually, I did find one

Kelly took this at Keith's Christmas party at Boondocks. A photo of me with makeup on. That almost never happens.

Long day

Jessica in the girls' room doorway, trying to round up the troops. Not looking my best, or even close to it, but it's rare that I'm in front of the camera.

Go up the stairs

And welcome to our place. It's a Bahamian (and hence Keys) tradition to put a conch shell outside your front door as a sign of welcome and good luck. The Bahamians were some of the first settlers here and Keys natives call themselves "conchs." For a fun story about our wacky history (as in 1980s history) look up The Conch Republic -- www.conchrepublic.com -- when we seceded from the U.S. in protest to Bush Sr. politics.